Great lines, shame about the acting

Bitch Slap.
This looked like one of those B-movies which is so dreadful that it’s actually quite entertaining for that alone. Alas, Bitch Slap isn’t one of those B-movies, but it does have some great one-liners (for adult use only). The plot is that some secret agent is trying to recover some piece of top secret kit. That’s about all you need to know.
The Chinese name of the film is 女子大乱斗 (Nǚzi Dà Luàndǒu), which appears to mean “Women Big Confusing Fight”. A fair description, I think.
Mr Bamboo says, “Don’t bother.”

Another curiosity buy. The film was released in 2002, which may be why I don’t remember it at all. Maggie Gyllenhaal plays a secretary with a history of self-mutilation who ends up in a humiliating masochistic relationship with her boss played by James Spader.
I have to admit that I didn’t understand this film at all. Is it meant to be a satire about the relationship between bosses and secretaries? Was it meant to be a kind of modern version of Chaucer’s Clerk’s Tale.
The Chinese title of the film says considerably more than “Secretary”. 风流老板俏秘书 (Fēngliú Lǎobǎn Qiào Mìshū) “A boss talented in letters and unconventional in lifestyle, a stylish secretary”. Not exactly how I would’ve described it. Actually, all he does is correct spelling mistakes, which takes comparatively little talent.

Middle of Nowhere.
Eva Amurri wants to go to university, but her larcenous mother, Susan Sarandon, has ruined her credit rating by taking out credit cards in her daughter’s name. Instead, Eva has to work as a lifeguard at the local swimming pool where she meets the poor boy who deals in drugs and some rich boy who seems decent enough, but will probably use her and cast her aside.
I suppose it’s meant to be a commentary on American life in the middle of nowhere. Indie-style film which probably got screened at places like the Cornerhouse in Manchester, but probably went straight to DVD.

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