All in the name of entertainment

Glen puts salad onions up his nose.
This morning both Glen and I were invited to some event in Class 5’s form room. I thought we were being asked to watch and comment on a rehearsal of Pride and Prejudice, but when various other teachers started turning up, including two Vice Principals and the Dowager Empress, I began to wonder what was going on. It turned out to be the performance of some other playlet, namely a world tour accompanied by notes on their customs and culture. Destinations included Australia (where British settlers beat the Aborigines to death with rolled up sheets of paper; well, you wouldn’t want convicts to have guns, would you?); the UK; the US; and Egypt, where, apparently, they shove salad onions up their noses as part of the celebration of some major festival. The kids then got Glen to join in the festive fun by celebrating Egyptian culture in the same way.
I assume that we can, perhaps, expect invitations from Classes 6 and 7. All right, perhaps from Class 6. I can’t imagine Class 7 doing anything like this except to the eternal embarrassment of the audience.
I’ve neglected to explain that this is the foreign culture week at school. There’s English Corner every lunchtime and a performance contest on Friday which we have to judge. Obviously Class 5 will be treating us to some sort of adaptation of Pride and Prejudice. It was my turn to do English Corner today. Unlike last year, the kids aren’t just coming from our classes, but there were only about ten and most of them seemed to come from the A-level programme.
Well, it’s better than seeing our lot in Babylonian captivity forced to attend English Corner. The school insisted on topics for each day when really the whole thing should be a free-for-all at which kids can bring along any English-related problems or queries they might have.

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